Trump Trumps and I'm Sick of the Hate

If you haven't heard, the new president of the United States has been decided and Donald Trump will soon begin his four year term in office. What started as an elaborate joke (that the whole nation laughed about) turned into one of the most contentious races for the Oval Office that this generation has ever seen. World wide, the reaction to Trump’s victory has been (almost hilariously) intense.

To me, it still doesn’t seem real. I voted and walked away immediately feeling dirty, as though I had picked my side, and could never come back from it. I did not regret voting, or who I voted for, but I felt an overwhelming and surprising surge of shame the moment I logged onto the web. There wasn’t a place I could go that wasn’t tainted by the election. Facebook was full of last minute pleas to “do the right thing” and angry rants as to who would “doom us all”. Instagram pictures were captioned with heartfelt essays as to how this election would affect their lives. Snapchat stories were nonstop negative campaign ads that got more malicious the later it got.

And then, the results came in.

I didn’t stay awake to find out America’s future. I didn’t wake up and immediately search for results. I simply went about my routine, opened up Twitter and was instantly overwhelmed by hate.

I mean… people. Please. PEOPLE. Seriously?!

I want to take this break to clarify something; I dislike Donald Trump. I do. I don’t hate him, though, because I don’t know him. I’ve never met him, so how can I say I hate him? He is a racist, a sexist, xenophobic, homophobic man. He has made that clear over the course of this election, but I don’t hate him; I pity him.

And I pity those who let their fear drive their actions and influence their words. Instead of coming together and offering kind words of encouragement and building each other up, people began to cast blame and tear each other apart.

We had sucky candidates. We knew we would have a sucky president. But do we have to be sucky people?

So, here is my call to action. “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything.”

This includes lamenting about the results, saying you’re “disappointed” in people, stereotyping the voters; really anything negative shouldn’t escape your thoughts. Be kind to people, do something nice daily, post uplifting comments, and upload some pictures of puppies. If it’s positive, it’s post worthy.

I won’t tell you not to have opinions, not to use your rights, and to just shut up and take it. I won’t tell you not to feel fear. I will tell you not to let fear and anger be your motivation. Be a positive person, and you will see positive change. 

PHT 101 What have I Done?

I'm chuckling to myself about the title because it rhymes.

Well, well, well, looks like I haven't perished in a freak boating incident (in large part due to my fear of boats)! The reason for my absence is actually incredibly normal; school. Yeah, school is in full swing now, as well as a potential part time job, and a potential secret opportunity that equal parts scares me, makes me sad, and excites me. More on that later.

For now, I wanted to give you guys a sneak peak of what I've been doing in my second favorite class, Photography 101!

Each week, we are assigned to shoot 50 photos by next Tuesday. Every new week, we have to work on something new such as angles, framing, etc. It's all so artsy and amazing! Well, it's week five, and here are my top picks from each week:

If you guys want to see more of my photos, my Instagram is @joybaylee or you can request I put more up here! Keep in mind, I'm still an amateur, and none of these photos are edited (because she wont let us even crop them, it's agony). Hopefully things will settle down for me and I can come back and post more regularly.

What Am I Doing?

This is all way harder than I expected it to be.

So, I have been blogging for about a month now, and I have around 8 posts and a little over 1,000 page views (cue celebratory party sound). On top of that, I recently started vlogging on my YouTube channel, Baylee Joy , and so far I've loved every minute of it.

The problem I didn't ever think I would run into has turned into my most common and infuriating problem to date; I don't know what to talk about.

I'm always talking, so how is this an issue?! I'm told to shut up more often than I am to speak up and yet some how my brain has managed to shut down and become a conversational black hole that swallows up every good idea I've ever produced! What's up with that, huh brain?

I am the master of rambling and the demi-god of tangents. I crack people up on the regular. I've even cracked myself up (sadly). Then I step in front of the camera, or put my fingers to the keyboard, and suddenly I can't find my personality. If you asked my friends, they'd tell you I'm a hyperactive moron with an above average IQ who enjoys the sound of her own voice too much to be healthy. On camera, I'm this awkward hippo who can't find her light and stumbles over basic english.

There are a lot of directions I can move my vlog into, including beauty vlogging, serious discussion, comedy channel, sketch channel, topic discussions, pop culture, blah, BlAh, BLAH. If we're being real, I'm not much of a beauty guru, and I can't hold a serious conversation for more than 2 minutes.

Part of my problem may be that I keep comparing myself to other established YouTubers. Through research and observation, I'm learning what people want and I'm finding myself rather lacking.

So what am I doing?

Well, no one starts out perfect, and I told myself I was going to pursue this. Maybe I'll never reach a million subscribers or even touch 100, but I'll be incredibly grateful for the few that I'll have and I'll continue to make content even if I only ever have 10 subscribers. It would be really encouraging if y'all could watch and like my videos though (#ShamelessSelfPromotion) and tell me what you think.

And if you have a channel, let me return the favor and encourage you to keep doing what you're doing!

What? Another Vlog?

Hey everyone!

That's right, I've posted another vlog! I have finally kicked my butt into gear and took my own advice; not to be a hypocrite. For years I've been telling people I was going to start my own YouTube channel and be one of the greats like Shane Dawson, Julian Smith, or Ryan Higa. I think the first time I said aloud that I wanted to be a YouTuber was my freshman year of high school.

It took me around 6 years, but here I am now, with two channels and bursting with video ideas! This time, there are no more excuses! So prepare your selves for the Reign of Baylee, be prepared for sensational... okay, I won't quote Lion King.

But here is a link to my new vlog, check it out and head to my other channel as well!

My First Vlog!

My first vlog is out!

Week One and Done

It's finally the beginning of the fall semester for us poor college kids! The Freshmen are pouring in and wandering the campus in their confusion. The Seniors are already working on term papers and searching for jobs. And then there's me, living it up for one more semester before I officially gain my associates degree!

I still remember my first week at college. Sure, I didn't have to move into a dorm, but the shock of jumping from the rigid structure of high school to the freedom that comes with a college campus was overwhelming at first. There weren't teachers roaming the hall and ushering students from class to class or a bell ringing and warning me to rush to my next course. No one was there to tell me I couldn't wander around outside in my free time or simply pack up and skip. In the classroom was even stranger. Professors don't have time for you to ask to use the restroom, or say you need a nurse. If you want, just hop up and walk out.

Well, amidst all of this chaos, I was on the hunt for a spot to call my own. NVCC Woodbridge is a small campus. We have three buildings (four if you count the tiny one next to the bookshop) and each one is packed with places to hide and sit for a few quiet minutes. This is great since sometimes I had to wait up to 3 hours before my next class would start. On one memorable occasion, I waited 6 hours. 6 HOURS! So it's important to find your own quiet spot to recuperate. Mine happened to be the old cafeteria in the crappiest building. It's also the perfect people watching spot, but that's just a side note.

While I got used to the campus, I also learned that the first week (or two if you have dynamic courses) is the time to determine who are the good students, the fun students, and the least likely to come back for week 2. This is crucial if you have a professor who likes group projects.

The Good Student
The good student is always on time. They show up with the printouts in a neat little stack and any assigned homework completed. They take meticulous notes that can sometimes be color coded. They are always down for a study session, though beware the Grumpy Good Student, because they only work alone. This is the student you want to befriend, because they will be your key to success in a class you may not understand.

The Fun Student
The fun student is mostly on time, with the exception of having to stop for some Chipotle on the way to class. They show up and make the class laugh, often cracking a smile from the professor. They have creative minds, but sometimes can't back it up with talent (but that's okay). You can always count on them to be friendly and outgoing. This is the student you should strike up conversations with because they'll always have an interesting story on hand.

The Least Likely to Return
Don't get attached to this student. They may not be coming back, no matter how awesome a person they are. They may even normally be a Good Student, but this is not the class for them. Usual reasons for leaving include:

• They found out they don't even need this class anymore, so why waste the money.
• The professor is their least favorite person in the world, and they'd rather not deal with them.
• They showed up day one to get the run down, then don't return until the finals, where they find out if they don't get a perfect score, they'll have flunked the class

Really though, people are crazy and unpredictable. Make friends with who you want to and have a great time learning together.

So with all this learned and primed for use, I think this "Week One" was a success. I felt little to no stress and managed to enjoy observing other peoples week ones. It is oddly fun to stalk people's social media in the first week of school.

*Side story*

So this relates to the topic of week one because this happened to me this past week. I'm taking 5 classes this semester in an attempt to not come back in the spring; Photography 101, ITE, Interpersonal Com, Art History 2, and Cultural Geography. Well, all but one of these classes started without a hitch. So Tuesday, I exit my IT class and head for Cultural Geo, only to be stunned by an email I received on the way. My professor had emailed the class 10 minutes before it was scheduled to start to say that he would no longer be teaching the class and that we should seek out the Dean to find a new professor.

WHAT THE HECK!?

Keep in mind, this was after having 2 of my classes cancelled 2 weeks before school started, so, I was beyond pissed. I was on my way to yell at a councilor, when I noticed a large mass of students heading in the same direction. Turns out my Geo class had formed a mob and were headed for the Dean. I joined in and we had to navigate our way across buildings 3 times before we were finally told that they would find us a new professor by Thursday.

In the end, they did get us a new professor, but that just goes to show, your first week could be worse.

Fantastic Fiction

Fantastic Fiction (and where to find it).

Get it? Like JK Rowling's new movie "Fantastic Beasts And Where to Find Them" except not nearly as well written nor as anticipated. Unlike Rowling's movie, my new blog will not be filled with famous actors and action packed wizard fight sequences. Actually, it might, because my new blog is going to be an eclectic compilation of poetry, short stories, scripts, etc.

That's right folks, I write. I write a lot actually. More than most people ever want to. The problem is that none of my manuscripts ever see the light of day (much like myself) and remain hidden on my laptop. Yet, I love my stories and the insane way they're told. And so, as a gift to all of you, I created my new blog:

Much Wow.

Alright, now that that announcement's out of the way, let me tell you why I haven't been posting.

STRESS.

Stress from work, stress from the upcoming semester, and a lot of stress from organizing my schedule. I am in my last official week of the internship I have been a part of for 3 months. Literally all summer long! It's been equal parts great and horrible. Great, because making money is always great. Horrible, because I lost my entire summer to copying and pasting documents in an office without a window.

I'll admit that I learned a lot while working for InfoReliance. They taught me how and why the government uses contracts. I learned more about Word and Excel than I ever have. Really, it taught me a whole new skill set that is required for working in a professional office environment. My coworkers were all incredibly friendly and totally ready to help me whenever I needed it. And there was free food. Lots of free food. They had multiple kitchens stocked with snacks, soda, coffee, HOT CHOCOLATE, etc. It was like a dream come true. There were also the typical down sides.

While it was a novel idea having an office of my own during the first week, I quickly came to resent the cramped death cubicle. There was no window, and for some reason it was perpetually hot like a dry day in the desert. The work I was given was exciting at first, until I realized that all I had to do was copy and paste from one document to another. All summer long. My fingers are traumatized. Add on 3 hours of driving - minimum - a day and that just equaled a lot of crying and repeated One Direction traffic parties.

Seriously though, it was totally worth all the headaches and morning crying sessions. 9/10 would recommend.

The best thing to come out of all of this is that it solidified my determination to never work in a traditional office environment. It's something I think everyone should do once in their life time, but dear Lord, no one should want to willingly spend the prime of their life surrounded by beige everything! SO MUCH BEIGE!

Set-back or an Opportunity?

If there is one thing I am no longer an amateur at, it would be getting bad news. 

My story is a long and convoluted one, though everything looked so straight forward when I was young and naive. I grew up hearing the same propaganda the rest of you did. Or maybe some of you didn't. Maybe some of you grew up without a life already planned for you. You didn't have to suffer through the long spiel of how you'll go to a good University and graduate with a sensible degree and then get an average paying job.

I never noticed how much I thought this was the only course of action until it was no longer a real option for me. Honestly, a lot of the blame could fall on me and my propensity to procrastinate, but there are some things that are just out of our control.

Senior year of high school, I applied for three colleges, but I only had my heart set on one. That's what you're expected to do. In the average, well advertised life, the young potential graduate becomes an avid fan of their University of choice. Then, when they are inevitably accepted, they celebrate by buying excessive amounts of spirit wear that they will only really wear on important game days. With all this in mind, I chose VCU, a well respected arts college where I could hone my cinematic skills! I was so excited to receive their decision that I proudly opened it up in the middle of my house... and then promptly wished I hadn't.

So my 'favorite' school had denied me. I did what any melancholy teenager would do and I got in my car and drove to the nearest quiet area. "Okay," I reasoned, "So I can't go there, but maybe the other schools..."

I chose to be logical in that moment because all I'd grown up hearing and seeing was that you needed to go to a four year university, you needed to pick a degree with guaranteed jobs, you NEEDED to follow those simple steps. But when the other two letters came in, I couldn't convince myself to settle. 

Liberty University accepted me. In fact, they seemed way too excited to bring me into the fold and shape me into an LU fan.  I felt... I don't know what I felt, but I couldn't picture myself at LU, no matter how much the letter insisted I would fit in. So I declined.

George Mason University accepted me. Their level of enthusiasm was sad in comparison to LU and I knew in a heart beat that I couldn't spend four years there. So again, I declined.

And this left me in a grey area, where I couldn't see any new paths to follow because... well because I never planned to get lost. Everything had seemed so straight and narrow.

Yet, for every low, there must be a high. An option suddenly presented itself and, though it seemed like a bitter pill to swallow at the time, it turned out pretty bearable; Community College.

You may shudder to hear it; that anyone would choose community college over a 4 year school. At the time, I was abhorred. I grew up in a bubble where community college was for the dumb and the underachievers. Only people with no ambition went there. My friends were perplexed by my choice to attend and tried to talk me out of it. "You aren't stupid, you don't need to go there." they would say.

And I learned they were right, for the most part. I'm not stupid, but community college has been so much more than underachievers and lacking students. It's full of a variety of people with multitudes of reasons to be there. I can go on and on about the virtues of attending a community college, but I'll leave that for another day.

So I had set out on a new path and already the instructions were being rewritten for me. I would study there for two years, get my associates degree, and then transfer to any college I wanted! I was doing well, until I heard about Full Sail University. It sounds like a cheap online school, but it's actually a renowned media arts college. I could study there for two years and graduate with all the skills and knowledge I would need for a job in film.

Encouraged, I dropped my work load that spring from 5 classes down to just 2. Then, I learned more and more about the school and suddenly it didn't appeal to me. Of course, it's a great school and I've heard amazing reviews, but I knew I wouldn't make it in an environment so far from home and so brutal.

So I was set back a semester and would need two and a half years to graduate with my associates. Okay, I could handle that. I worked hard an entire year and made and lost friends, and along the way, I started to discover that my future would never be straight and narrow. 

Life isn't a series of steps. Life is more like a cliff side. You can't see what's at the top from the bottom, but you know there's a ledge with an incredible view, so you choose to climb. You've never climbed this cliff before, and so as you go, each hand hold, each spot you place your foot, it's new and it's uncertain. You try to plan by looking up and ahead, but sometimes what you thought was a great foot hold turns out to be unstable or broken. And then sometimes, you're presented with a whole new path five feet to left, with a hundred new possibilities to factor in.

This week, I thought I'd finally found my next hand hold, only to look back up and see it had disappeared. I will graduate this fall with my associates in General Studies, but I will not be able to attend my college of choice in the spring. 

Understandably, I was upset. Another year, wasted. 

And yet, because of the person I've grown to be through my experiences, I feel immensely hopeful. I am faced with an entire semester to do with as I wish. There are more opportunities than ever before for me to pursue:

I can finally put real time and effort into my YouTube channel.

I can volunteer abroad and help underprivileged children.

I can apply for a new internship with any company I want.

What I thought was just another set-back has once again proven to be so much more than that; it's an abundance of opportunity.

I Was a Prostitute

So the title may be a bit misleading. I was not and will never be an actually lady of the night. I played a British harlot in the fantastically dark musical 'Jekyll & Hyde'. But, I got you to read this post, didn't I? That's some good old fashioned media marketing right there!

So the real story. 

My freshman year of high school, I decided to audition for the school musical, unaware of what it was and what it was about, and some how passed the initial rounds of casting. Let me tell you, I really should not have made it into the musical. My audition skills were amateur at best, and down right sad at worst. So here are the things I did wrong, and how you should avoid them:

1. I had no clue what I was auditioning for.
Knowing is the key to... not looking stupid. Also, your whole audition should be based around the show and the role you want. Freshman Baylee was not aware of this. She heard 'musical auditions' the day before and dove headfirst into the shallow end. 

If you are auditioning for a musical, the first thing you do is determine the genre. Is it a comedy? Is it a drama? Is it 'West Side Story'? If it's the third option, walk away and don't look back. Trust me. But, if it so happens to be a drama like Jekyll, then your song and monologue should be dramas as well. If you want to be the leading lady, pick a few bars from one of her more flashy songs. If you want to be Nellie, the child prostitute/ probably-a-pimp, use a seductive monologue.

2. I auditioned with 'The Only Exception' by Paramour.
I can't listen to that song anymore without cringing. I actually die a little on the inside if it comes on the radio. Don't audition with a pop song unless specifically told to. There will be regret. So. Much. Regret.

3. I probably looked like a tornado dressed me.
I say probably only because I can't quite remember what I wore, but I remember that I did not value fashion the way I do now. From what I recall and from the few surviving pictures of me, I would say I probably wore ratty blue jeans, some strange off-brand Toms, and a shirt that most likely said something about summer. My hair was dyed a streaky dishwater blonde and in the midst of growing out an unfortunate haircut. 

Do not dress like Freshman Baylee.

Wear something professional that you can move around in. There shouldn't be any logos or brand names stamped across the fabric. My advice to you, just throw on a plain black tee shirt, some dark and stretchy skinny jeans, and Keds. Can't go wrong with Keds. If you want to stand out, use your personality. Trust me, that'll impress them way more. 

(I'm the one with the legs.)

The rest of what I learned is actually second hand. At the same time I was making a fool of myself, a friend of mine was making an ass of himself. 

Cory walked into his audition like my polar opposite. He was confident in his abilities and just knew he would land the leading role. He sauntered onto the stage and peered into the audience, finding two women sitting side by side. One he knew, our chorus teacher, Mrs. Bruno. The other, he did not.

"Excuse me," He said, "But this is a closed audition." He probably raised his eyebrows and everything. The unnamed woman probably raised hers right back before replying.

"I know, I'm the director." Mrs. Cook responded.

Cory had made the fatal mistake of pissing off the director, and he knew it. He will claim this is where his audition went down hill, but I like to think it did the moment he opened his mouth.

After having his swagger ripped out from under him, Cory decided to just hop right into the rest of his audition. He started with the chorus of some popular rap song that I never listened to. Maybe this would have worked if he were auditioning for 'Hamilton', but the choice seemed a tad odd for a musical about Victorian Britain. He stumbled his way through it and finally came to the monologue portion.

This, he thought, was where he would redeem himself. He had chosen it carefully with the show in mind; a monologue from 'The Phantom of the Opera'. He began and then... stopped. 

"Um..." He muttered, than began again, making it about three lines in before... he stopped again.

"May I... can I look at the paper?" He had to ask sheepishly. He told me he felt like an idiot at this point. Mrs. Cook graciously allowed him to read from his printed copy, and he got about halfway through before she stopped him.

"That's not from Phantom." She said. Cory stared blank faced back, not really understanding. "I've seen and read Phantom, and that is not from the musical."

At this point if Cory were me, he would have started crying and then moved to some obscure place in Alaska to research alien life forms. Cory, though, is not me, and instead stood there until she said he could continue with his false Phantom piece.

Surprisingly, despite both of our atrocious first auditions, we got called backed. We then found our names on the cast list and thus, I became the child prostitute/ seriously-I-think-she-may-have-also-been-a-pimp Nellie, and Cory starred as Poole, the oddly incompetent butler.

(Cory (blue suit) is studying opera at Oberlin University. Here, he's preforming in Miami.)

Evacuate the Dance Floor

Do you remember when amateur music videos were all the rage on YouTube? I'm not talking about the cool parody songs, or horribly done official music videos. No, I'm talking about when a group of kids would pick a song (probably angst ridden) and lip sync along while filming the whole thing in their backyard. You know, the Dark Days.

Well, I may have... dabbled in that genre. Just a bit, and I never posted it anywhere. Okay, so I put it up on Facebook, but I deleted it so no worries right? It took me over 6 years to delete the monstrosity, but it's gone now and there are no existing copies of it. We are safe.

That's right, I was an amateur music video director. I picked 'Evacuate the Dance Floor' by Cascada and rounded up all of my closest friends to film what would become possibly the most amazing thing to come out of my middle school career. Well, other than the video project that almost got me expelled.

My closest friends turned out to be a group of people who could tolerate me enough to meet me at the playground after school. We donned ridiculous hats including a block of foam cheese and Darth Vader's mask. There weren't any smart phones at the time, so we played the song on repeat using my iPod touch and danced like we didn't know how. In my case, I really didn't know how, I still don't.

I had planned it all ahead of time, lyric by lyric, including a moment where we all roll down the hill for no reason other than what the heck else were we supposed to do during instrumental? Of course, we didn't finish filming that day, and scheduling more time to hangout when you're that age is more pain than it's worth. Therefore, I moved on to a different group of friends to help me complete the project.

That's right, half way through the video, the entire cast (minus myself) changed. Continuity everybody. 

Eventually the filming bit was done, and I was ready to move on to editing. I logged on to my family computer and opened Windows Movie Maker. I can hear all of you cringing. It was through this program that I learned what cutting together shots even meant and boy did that clear up a lot. Years of running from behind the camera and ending the video by awkwardly turning it off from the front, all for naught.

This video was horrible, but equally amazing. It was my first time putting something out there for people, despite all my misgivings. I had taken one of many first steps in my path to figuring out what I wanted to do with my future. I've changed my mind many times, travelling all over the job spectrum, but I've always come back to those early videos, the ones that lacked in quality but made up for it with personality.

So cheers to putting yourself out there, to taking the first step, and to finding a path worth following!

True Amateur Blogger

Amateur.

The word has some sort of strange stigma surrounding it. It's become an insult rather than a mere label. Even as I chose the title for my blog, it seemed like I was insulting myself and my ability. I could have humbly dubbed my blog 'The Awesome Blog of the Amazing Story of Baylee and Her Rise to Stardom', but that seemed 1. a bit long, and 2. a little too hard to live up to.

Sure, my life is pretty fantastic (in my mind) and I have a lot going for me (probably), but the blatant truth is that I am new to this scene. This is my first real blog; my first real blog post! My only other encounter with the art of blogging was a required weekly assignment for English 112 in college. So I kept skirting around the word 'amateur' until finally I decided, "I am an amateur, this is who I am, let's stop worrying about the title, move on, and freaking post something already."

So my internal dialogue is a little wordy, but you get the point.

All that being said, hello there!

I'm sure you are now sick of the word 'amateur' and I bet it has started to sound a little weird in your head. Good. I like to think that my personality works the same way, in such that sure, I should make sense, but no, the longer I think about it I do not in fact make any sense what so ever. I am a 20 year old woman trying to figure out what I like best about life and my opinions will change often and usually without reason. So can you really blame me if I get off topic a lot? 

I wanted my first post on this blog to be something of an introduction to who I am and what I will most likely be blogging about. I considered going with the typical "Hello, my name is Baylee and I am here to share my views on blah blah blah". Easy to read and totally straight forward, but oh my gosh, horribly boring! I can't not read that in a robotic voice or worse, in the voice of 15 year old me during high school presentations.

So then how would I go about introducing myself? 

My name is Baylee.

BOOM! There it is! That is all I'm telling you! The rest, you can piece together post by post or through good, old fashioned internet stalking. I'm sure I'll be posting plenty of pictures, and who knows, maybe I'll try my hand at being an amateur vlogger! 

For now though, I'll stick to learning the art of the blog. If you have any handy tips, tricks, or credit card numbers, leave me a comment below! I can't wait to share my mind with all of you!